You Belong, Too!

By: Debra Wenig Kendrick

I recently saw The Last Movie Star, a movie with Burt Reynolds, and it has resulted in my continuing journey to say thank you to my “lifesavers.”

I’m talking about the many people who gave me a sense of belonging and thought that I deserved a meaningful life after my 1981 suicide attempt at Hartwick College.

I have grappled with trying to fit in for years and spent my entire adult life trying to forget this difficult period, the people I may have hurt, and feelings of shame and embarrassment.

Now, I am thanking those who shaped the person I am today for caring about me even when I had mental illness challenges.

I first contacted the George W. Bush Presidential Center because I was inspired by the former president’s effort to eliminate the D from PTSD. (Bush pushed for viewing Post Traumatic Stress as an injury instead of a disorder to reduce stigma and help veterans see it as treatable.)

That helped me redefine and rebrand myself as someone with a bipolar illness, not a disorder.  

After lunch with a Bush staffer, I called Tim at Hartwick College to reintroduce myself, then returned to campus in January and met with alumni, staff members, faculty, Hartwick president Darren Reisberg, and my counselor.

Doug, a well-liked student, reached out, and I look forward to meeting and taking a picture with him.

New memories are still coming my way!

I met with Tom, my first New York City boss, and had a drink with Jim, a colleague of my husband and friend who was always receptive when we met at professional social events.

I emailed Marty who helped find my first New York apartment and contacted my former boy friend’s brother, a writer, who inspired my interest in public service and writing.

I am forever grateful to my 1980s boyfriend, who told me that I was a chameleon, helping me realize that I can belong everywhere.

Please do not concern yourself about where or with whom you feel you may not belong. Find other people and make new memories.  

My journey helped me realize that President Bush, Tom, Doug, Marty, Tim, many others, and my family have contributed to my story.  

Why? Because I belong, and they knew it.

Debra Wenig Kendrick, who lives in Preston Hollow, wants to remind you about 988, the national Suicide and Crisis Lifeline.