A reader following the recent parenting debate fueled by the release of author Amy Chua’s new book Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother, wonders how area residents feel about her methods. Chinese vs. Parkinese.
Even if Chua’s methods are off-the-charts extreme in terms of academics, would they be merely on the “tougher” end of the spectrum of what is commonly seen around here on the playing fields, when it comes to Parkie kids’ SPORTS?
The only thing tougher than Chua’s treatment of her children, is the standard Parkie mom and dad’s comments regarding OTHER Parkies kids. Hearing an “adult” attack a 7th grade girls dress, or a 3rd grade boys athletic performance, or spread rumors about children, is truly astounding (and despicable). And yet I hear it daily.
It all depends on what types of human beings you want to help create. Though I love the departure from the radical individualism that marks the modern West, this type of worldview has always seemed to me to be very extremely other-driven with its emphasis on “accomplishment” rather “living well” (and the attendant happiness that comes from living well) a la Aristotle. I do agree however that most of pop culture is trash and is to be avoided. Life is more than intense work and intense entertainments.
The only difference I see is that Parkies would hire a piano/violin ‘tutor’ for $175-250/hour to mentally abuse their children rather than do it themselves.
A.B.,
As a second generation Parkie, I do agree that hiring tutors at any price would have been considered the ‘way to go’. However, it does not work! You can’t pay someone enough $$ to care about your kids.
My opinion is that Chinese parents train their children to be followers by forcing compliance. Creativity is natural to children at birth and whenever logical should be protected despite chaos/conflict. Good parenting strikes the right balance between creativity and control. Further, through tough love Chinese parents are not cultivating compassion necessary for children to develop empathy. The question is how many of these Chinese kids become leaders/innovators with high emotional intelligence when they grow up despite their obvious academic and extracurricular successes?
No organized sports is the Deal Killer!
Even if Chua’s methods are off-the-charts extreme in terms of academics, would they be merely on the “tougher” end of the spectrum of what is commonly seen around here on the playing fields, when it comes to Parkie kids’ SPORTS?
The only thing tougher than Chua’s treatment of her children, is the standard Parkie mom and dad’s comments regarding OTHER Parkies kids. Hearing an “adult” attack a 7th grade girls dress, or a 3rd grade boys athletic performance, or spread rumors about children, is truly astounding (and despicable). And yet I hear it daily.
It all depends on what types of human beings you want to help create. Though I love the departure from the radical individualism that marks the modern West, this type of worldview has always seemed to me to be very extremely other-driven with its emphasis on “accomplishment” rather “living well” (and the attendant happiness that comes from living well) a la Aristotle. I do agree however that most of pop culture is trash and is to be avoided. Life is more than intense work and intense entertainments.
I think my mom must have been Chinese and I just didn’t know it.
The only difference I see is that Parkies would hire a piano/violin ‘tutor’ for $175-250/hour to mentally abuse their children rather than do it themselves.
A.B.,
As a second generation Parkie, I do agree that hiring tutors at any price would have been considered the ‘way to go’. However, it does not work! You can’t pay someone enough $$ to care about your kids.
My opinion is that Chinese parents train their children to be followers by forcing compliance. Creativity is natural to children at birth and whenever logical should be protected despite chaos/conflict. Good parenting strikes the right balance between creativity and control. Further, through tough love Chinese parents are not cultivating compassion necessary for children to develop empathy. The question is how many of these Chinese kids become leaders/innovators with high emotional intelligence when they grow up despite their obvious academic and extracurricular successes?